[ he can't keep his arm there under this situation, it's too much to focus on. david makes a low noise, almost a growl, and finally pulls his arm back, planting his hand heavily on evan's chest instead. ]
[ david's not about to just give up control like this though, he keeps moving down from where he was at evan's collarbone. bites the flesh of his chest, moves further to suck a nipple into his mouth, testing for a reaction. ]
[ the loss of pressure on his neck makes him suck in a hard breath - not that he was being choked before, but it definitely had the feel of it. then of course david's hand is pressed hard against his chest, putting pressure there, but whatever irritation that gets him is wiped clean when david's mouth is there, too.
evan makes a noise he's certain he'll regret later, even if it's caught through clenched teeth. his grip around david tightens unintentionally, the now-free hand scrabbling in david's hair again. he loosens his grip, but it's a bad sign that he gave anything away at all.
of course, david gets a lot of that out of him. always has, in fact. ]
[ david moans softly, encouraging the hand in his hair, anything evan wants to do now that isn't fighting him. it's another noise for david to swallow, catalogue and file away and pretend it's not going to flit through his mind some night when he's on his own. ]
[ the fingers of the hand he has on evan's chest curl against him, nails scratching at his skin, rocking against his hip and into his hand as he keeps up what he's doing, seeing how close he can get to fully overwhelming evan. ]
[ he needs to fight back. not to stop this but to take control of it. he's never really lost control in his life - well, no, that's an outright lie, the ultimate truth is that he's never had any control at all but in shit like this he's always had control - so the idea of giving in like this to david is ...
without him thinking about it, his hips jerk up against david, against his hand and his thigh. he tries to draw some of that attention away from his chest with a sudden squeeze and stroke, tries to get something resembling his own self-control back. or at least a little room to fucking breathe.
he wants to swear, wants to curse david out, wants to call him a whole slew of names. none of it gets out. he just pulls harder at david's hair, tries to lighten the pressure and intensity, tries not to give in too soon, too easily. it's hard enough to breathe without making some kind of noise. swearing would be a godawful idea. ]
[ david curses under his breath, has to stop what he's doing with his mouth to press his forehead against evan's chest and suck in a breath just to get ahead of this a little. a shudder running through him, hips jerking into evan's hand. ]
[ it's only the length of a breath though, picking back up with a bite for good measure. he's never had this hard a time staying focused on his partner, but maybe that makes sense, it's almost always been women. ]
[ but evan's close, he can tell. david lets his hand roam over the other side of evan's chest while he adjusts his grip to something a little firmer to try and finish him off. ]
[ it hits him too late that this isn't actually something mutual david was pushing here. he's trying to get him off deliberately. it's almost a shock, because everything they've done up until now except that first drunk blowjob in his apartment has been mutual. the idea that it might not be - ]
H-hold on -
[ but it's too little too late, because david's already got a new grip, a firmer touch, and between that and bites and everything else evan has to let go of david's dick to stop from hurting him unintentionally. he digs his fingers into david's hip instead and both hands grip probably too tight as he slams his head back into the bed, trying to hold out a little longer and failing.
he doesn't quite make a noise when he comes, but there's a whine in the hiss of breath he lets escape between his teeth. the tension's rock-solid in him, and then it drops, although he doesn't loosen his grip on david at all. ]
[ david has to actively stop himself saying anything at first, because every instinctive response he has is one he doesn't think evan would respond to well to; not because they're insulting, the complete opposite actually. evan seems like the type to immediately get his hackles up about any kind of praise, especially from david. ]
[ he takes his hand off evan when he's done and smooths it out over his hip, presses his forehead against his chest again with a breathless laugh at evan calling him a fucker. yeah, maybe. ]
[ he's completely right - evan would lose his shit even more than usual over that. it'd unnerve him again to find out that david knows him a lot better than he'd like. it's never good, being that known by someone who hates you.
after he manages to get his breathing back under control, he pulls david's head up not too roughly with the grip on his hair and glares at him. ]
I'm not blowing you.
[ he's not going to leave without finishing things here, but it'll be with a hand, most likely. he can't deal with the idea of doing otherwise. ]
[ david lets out another breathless laugh and reaches up for evan's wrist, trying to get him to let go of his hair so he can roll off him and onto the bed next to him. that was a lot of work, he thinks he deserves to lay down now. ]
Wasn't expecting you to.
[ he's not expecting anything at all, truthfully. not that he'd turn it down, but something about that was... satisfying. ]
[ david's lack of annoyance, or insult, or ... anything, really, is somehow more irritating than if he'd pushed back.
evan lets go and manages to get himself almost sitting, glaring down at david who's just ... relaxing, like he's the one who got off here. he can tell the interest is still there - it's really clear given they're both down to their underwear - so why the hell is he so calm?
for a few seconds he just waits to see what happens next, and then, realizing david's basically (not really) defenseless, evan pushes himself up and climbs onto him. not hard, not fast, not rough. not like he expects david to swing at him for it. but enough to box him in on the bed, one hand flat next to his head, the other at his hip, pulling his underwear down enough to free him. ]
[ his eyes glint with interest when evan climbs on him, surprised but also not really surprised at all — evan doesn't like to leave things uneven between them if he can help it, which means david has no cause to complain unless he plans on being an asshole about it. ]
[ he grunts, relief at being freed from his underwear, eyes tracking what he can comfortably see of what evan's doing. an amused pull to his expression when evan calls him a liar, because why would he expect that from someone who's shown exactly zero interest in doing it? ]
Nah.
[ for a moment he looks like he has more to say, but he shakes his head, still with a hint of that smirk when he looks up at evan and lifts a hand to the side of his neck, thumb braced along the edge of his jaw. ]
[ evan outright does not believe that david doesn't want something out of this, but maybe that's not what david's replying to. doesn't matter now. evan's got a hand around him, more familiar now than he should be comfortable with, and strokes him once, carefully, scowling at the smirk and the touch to his neck and jaw.
it's intimate. it's too intimate. but he's already made out with this bastard in a dark corner while both their families were twenty feet below them, how is this any different?
he's still a little sluggish, but that doesn't loosen his grip or change the roughness of his palm as he strokes david, careful, trying to be intent without being weak. he turns his head, slightly, lips against david's thumb for a second before turning back to fix him with a very certain glower again. ]
[ david's not thinking about the intimacy of this, half his mind on how funny it is that evan seems so put upon about this even though david literally did not and wasn't going to ask anything of him. you don't always get to be attracted to who you're with and sometimes you don't even get off so david's worked his way around that by finding other things to give him that sense of satisfaction. usually it's seeing how powerfully he can get his partner off. ]
[ of course that doesn't mean he's done and not interested anymore, he is still ridiculously hard, and at this point a little extra sensitive too, something that shows in the way he hisses and his eyes flutter at the first pass of evan's hand. ]
[ unconsciously he presses his thumb against evan's bottom lip when he feels the touch, other hand hooking under the arm by his head to grab his shoulder. he's not going to bother pretending this isn't going to be fast. ]
[ it's just a trade, in evan's mind. evening the playing field. making it so that he doesn't owe david, even if david wouldn't hold it against him. he might, and that's enough.
getting him to react has an edge of satisfaction - just from him, too, not from something shared. it shouldn't, but it does. a little like getting him to limp away after a fight but not really the same. evan keeps the movement of his hand going, although it stutters a little when david's thumb is at his lip again.
it's too close. too personal. too ... everything. but he doesn't turn his head away this time, even if he doesn't give in to the little spark of an urge to turn his head into it and open his mouth and let david's thumb slip in, either. it's a light little pressure that reminds him this is getting to be less and less of a quick little thing between them. it's getting to be its own secret. something uncontrollable.
but he'll be fucked if he's about to pull away now. he's never had better sex, and it's just jerking each other off. that's all. really. ]
[ none of this is any big deal, of course not. the fact that he's about to come this hard after a few pumps from evan is... it's just been a long day. a stressful and weird day. for no particular reason. ]
[ david's hips jerk up to meet evan's hand, fingers digging in where he's gripping his shoulder, a sharp groan coming out of him as he comes. ]
[ worn out as he is, evan's got enough focus to keep his hand moving and to keep it firmly down - meaning that when david comes it's not aimed up at him but rather across david's chest, which thus far david doesn't seem to have had a problem with. sure, evan's got his own on himself but that's a problem for later. besides, it's his own. that's different.
sight and sound don't normally hit him hard and probably never will hit as hard as they do for david, but something twists in his chest at it, since normally he's too distracted to get a chance to see or hear this. it doesn't show on his face but he knows, unfortunately for him, that it'll be lodged in his brain as solidly as david's leaving a bruise on his shoulder.
he waits and doesn't let go until david relaxes, sitting back on the bed next to him. something feels off about this, but he can't place it. aside from his own crippling anxiety about being found out, after all. oh, and he's not wearing a shirt. and he just jerked a guy off (who jerked him off first). and ... ]
[ when he starts to come back down, the grip he has on evan's shoulder loosens and his other hand falls lazily from evan's neck to the bed. ]
[ he stays like that at first, eyes closed with a calm, almost-smile on his face while he enjoys that post-orgasm feeling. ]
[ the warm sense of calm and satisfaction fades a little when he looks up at evan and sees him sat there, looking like he's on the edge of a spiral. david hesitates on saying anything at all for a moment and then settles on a casual inquiry. ]
[ david's voice startles him a little, although he doesn't show it. he glances over at david, realizing he was dwelling on shit, and shrugs, trying to force the tension out of his shoulders. ]
Yeah.
[ that's convincing. he rolls his shoulders instead, glances down, grimaces at himself. ]
Gonna use your shower quick.
[ the idea of using another man's shower doesn't bother him quite as much as it might in another life, because he's showered in stranger places before. still, he's not going to think about this too much.
it also doesn't occur to him to ask permission, because ... since when has he ever done that with someone outside his family in his life? ]
[ but he's not about to push evan on it either. seeing as david took the majority of the people skills between them, he has the awareness to know he's already pushed evan a lot today, and anything more could be explosive. besides, why would he care? he doesn't. obviously. ]
Yeah-- through there.
[ he points out the door like there's an abundance of places it could be and waits for evan to go before he gets up to sort himself out. first by fixing his underwear so he's something approaching decent, and then he goes collecting their clothes from where they've ended up around the flat. uses his shirt to wipe up his front quickly and tosses that in the laundry, his pants haphazardly kicked closer to his bed. evan's clothes get treated with a little more respect, they're nothing fancy so he doesn't bother laying them out so they won't wrinkle, but david does lay them out on the couch instead of just tossing them in a pile. ]
[ by the time evan comes back out, david will be leaning against a counter in the little kitchenette, waiting for the kettle to boil. he deserves a cup of tea, he's decided. ]
[ he ends up not actually showering, but rather finding a washcloth that probably hasn't been used and just cleaning off his chest, resettling himself, checking in the mirror for any evidence that one or both of them lost a little too much control. bruises, but nothing he can't explain or hide.
he takes a little longer than he should pulling himself together, and so by the time he gets out david's already in the kitchen - still not exactly dressed, but not totally naked, and ... making tea? then again, alcohol's probably a bad choice at this time of night.
evan gets dressed, dragging his shirt on before his pants, but just carries his jacket for now. he watches david for a little while. unsure what to do or say. just leaving is probably what he should do, but it also doesn't seem right. ]
Got any coffee?
[ he's not a tea kind of guy, on the grounds of having never once had it before. ]
[ coffee is mostly just fuel to david. at his parents' there's a bunch of fancy types that do, admittedly, taste good, but david doesn't care enough to buy for taste. ]
[ he's a little surprised that evan isn't just taking off immediately, but he doesn't have any complaints either, which should be a surprise but david just turns to reach up into a cupboard and pull down a mug while he waits for evan's answer. ]
[ it's just to wake him up and clear his head, which he really fucking needs right now, so he's glad david wasn't drinking or else he'd probably start in on that. he sets his jacket on the counter and waits, glancing around david's apartment again now that he's not so distracted.
it's normal. not the glamorous party room he'd always figured would be any home away from home, but then again, david's proven that's not his whole world lately.
he wonders if he should have something like this. other than the shitty empty apartment they've crashed at before. the thought passes quickly, though, because there's no point. he'd get found out and would have to explain. ]
[ making the coffee is quick, just hot water and instant that he then pushes along the counter toward evan. the tea is a little more involved, has david pulling down a jar of sugar and grabbing milk out of the fridge. he seems mostly in good spirits, evidently not thinking much of just being here in his underwear while evan's fully dressed. ]
[ he does glance at evan over his shoulder, but he doesn't really have much to say. mostly he's just giving a quick look to make sure he's not about to spiral again. ]
[ it's shitty instant coffee, which is what he needs right now. nothing added. just bitterness and caffeine. it'll get him back home in an acceptable mood. nothing for anyone to wonder or argue about. and not drunk, about to do or say something stupid.
he's no less tense than ever but the anxiety over everything drains as he focuses on the coffee. he glances at david's tea process, considering making a comment but deciding against it. no point in antagonizing him now.
in silence he drinks the coffee, not sure what he's waiting for. he checks his phone once, but there's nothing, thank fuck. ]
[ david glances back at evan again, bemused. the point? most food and drink doesn't have a point other than to be enjoyed, he thinks. ]
The point?
[ he echoes his own thoughts as he turns to lean against the counter. he does, at least, seem to consider it a little instead of just dismissing it outright despite the hint of a laugh in his voice, eyebrows pulled in thought. ]
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hardlydead) wrote2024-05-20 10:36 pm
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[ david's not about to just give up control like this though, he keeps moving down from where he was at evan's collarbone. bites the flesh of his chest, moves further to suck a nipple into his mouth, testing for a reaction. ]
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evan makes a noise he's certain he'll regret later, even if it's caught through clenched teeth. his grip around david tightens unintentionally, the now-free hand scrabbling in david's hair again. he loosens his grip, but it's a bad sign that he gave anything away at all.
of course, david gets a lot of that out of him. always has, in fact. ]
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[ the fingers of the hand he has on evan's chest curl against him, nails scratching at his skin, rocking against his hip and into his hand as he keeps up what he's doing, seeing how close he can get to fully overwhelming evan. ]
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without him thinking about it, his hips jerk up against david, against his hand and his thigh. he tries to draw some of that attention away from his chest with a sudden squeeze and stroke, tries to get something resembling his own self-control back. or at least a little room to fucking breathe.
he wants to swear, wants to curse david out, wants to call him a whole slew of names. none of it gets out. he just pulls harder at david's hair, tries to lighten the pressure and intensity, tries not to give in too soon, too easily. it's hard enough to breathe without making some kind of noise. swearing would be a godawful idea. ]
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[ it's only the length of a breath though, picking back up with a bite for good measure. he's never had this hard a time staying focused on his partner, but maybe that makes sense, it's almost always been women. ]
[ but evan's close, he can tell. david lets his hand roam over the other side of evan's chest while he adjusts his grip to something a little firmer to try and finish him off. ]
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H-hold on -
[ but it's too little too late, because david's already got a new grip, a firmer touch, and between that and bites and everything else evan has to let go of david's dick to stop from hurting him unintentionally. he digs his fingers into david's hip instead and both hands grip probably too tight as he slams his head back into the bed, trying to hold out a little longer and failing.
he doesn't quite make a noise when he comes, but there's a whine in the hiss of breath he lets escape between his teeth. the tension's rock-solid in him, and then it drops, although he doesn't loosen his grip on david at all. ]
- fucker.
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[ he takes his hand off evan when he's done and smooths it out over his hip, presses his forehead against his chest again with a breathless laugh at evan calling him a fucker. yeah, maybe. ]
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after he manages to get his breathing back under control, he pulls david's head up not too roughly with the grip on his hair and glares at him. ]
I'm not blowing you.
[ he's not going to leave without finishing things here, but it'll be with a hand, most likely. he can't deal with the idea of doing otherwise. ]
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Wasn't expecting you to.
[ he's not expecting anything at all, truthfully. not that he'd turn it down, but something about that was... satisfying. ]
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evan lets go and manages to get himself almost sitting, glaring down at david who's just ... relaxing, like he's the one who got off here. he can tell the interest is still there - it's really clear given they're both down to their underwear - so why the hell is he so calm?
for a few seconds he just waits to see what happens next, and then, realizing david's basically (not really) defenseless, evan pushes himself up and climbs onto him. not hard, not fast, not rough. not like he expects david to swing at him for it. but enough to box him in on the bed, one hand flat next to his head, the other at his hip, pulling his underwear down enough to free him. ]
Liar.
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[ he grunts, relief at being freed from his underwear, eyes tracking what he can comfortably see of what evan's doing. an amused pull to his expression when evan calls him a liar, because why would he expect that from someone who's shown exactly zero interest in doing it? ]
Nah.
[ for a moment he looks like he has more to say, but he shakes his head, still with a hint of that smirk when he looks up at evan and lifts a hand to the side of his neck, thumb braced along the edge of his jaw. ]
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it's intimate. it's too intimate. but he's already made out with this bastard in a dark corner while both their families were twenty feet below them, how is this any different?
he's still a little sluggish, but that doesn't loosen his grip or change the roughness of his palm as he strokes david, careful, trying to be intent without being weak. he turns his head, slightly, lips against david's thumb for a second before turning back to fix him with a very certain glower again. ]
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[ of course that doesn't mean he's done and not interested anymore, he is still ridiculously hard, and at this point a little extra sensitive too, something that shows in the way he hisses and his eyes flutter at the first pass of evan's hand. ]
[ unconsciously he presses his thumb against evan's bottom lip when he feels the touch, other hand hooking under the arm by his head to grab his shoulder. he's not going to bother pretending this isn't going to be fast. ]
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getting him to react has an edge of satisfaction - just from him, too, not from something shared. it shouldn't, but it does. a little like getting him to limp away after a fight but not really the same. evan keeps the movement of his hand going, although it stutters a little when david's thumb is at his lip again.
it's too close. too personal. too ... everything. but he doesn't turn his head away this time, even if he doesn't give in to the little spark of an urge to turn his head into it and open his mouth and let david's thumb slip in, either. it's a light little pressure that reminds him this is getting to be less and less of a quick little thing between them. it's getting to be its own secret. something uncontrollable.
but he'll be fucked if he's about to pull away now. he's never had better sex, and it's just jerking each other off. that's all. really. ]
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[ david's hips jerk up to meet evan's hand, fingers digging in where he's gripping his shoulder, a sharp groan coming out of him as he comes. ]
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sight and sound don't normally hit him hard and probably never will hit as hard as they do for david, but something twists in his chest at it, since normally he's too distracted to get a chance to see or hear this. it doesn't show on his face but he knows, unfortunately for him, that it'll be lodged in his brain as solidly as david's leaving a bruise on his shoulder.
he waits and doesn't let go until david relaxes, sitting back on the bed next to him. something feels off about this, but he can't place it. aside from his own crippling anxiety about being found out, after all. oh, and he's not wearing a shirt. and he just jerked a guy off (who jerked him off first). and ... ]
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[ he stays like that at first, eyes closed with a calm, almost-smile on his face while he enjoys that post-orgasm feeling. ]
[ the warm sense of calm and satisfaction fades a little when he looks up at evan and sees him sat there, looking like he's on the edge of a spiral. david hesitates on saying anything at all for a moment and then settles on a casual inquiry. ]
You good?
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Yeah.
[ that's convincing. he rolls his shoulders instead, glances down, grimaces at himself. ]
Gonna use your shower quick.
[ the idea of using another man's shower doesn't bother him quite as much as it might in another life, because he's showered in stranger places before. still, he's not going to think about this too much.
it also doesn't occur to him to ask permission, because ... since when has he ever done that with someone outside his family in his life? ]
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[ but he's not about to push evan on it either. seeing as david took the majority of the people skills between them, he has the awareness to know he's already pushed evan a lot today, and anything more could be explosive. besides, why would he care? he doesn't. obviously. ]
Yeah-- through there.
[ he points out the door like there's an abundance of places it could be and waits for evan to go before he gets up to sort himself out. first by fixing his underwear so he's something approaching decent, and then he goes collecting their clothes from where they've ended up around the flat. uses his shirt to wipe up his front quickly and tosses that in the laundry, his pants haphazardly kicked closer to his bed. evan's clothes get treated with a little more respect, they're nothing fancy so he doesn't bother laying them out so they won't wrinkle, but david does lay them out on the couch instead of just tossing them in a pile. ]
[ by the time evan comes back out, david will be leaning against a counter in the little kitchenette, waiting for the kettle to boil. he deserves a cup of tea, he's decided. ]
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he takes a little longer than he should pulling himself together, and so by the time he gets out david's already in the kitchen - still not exactly dressed, but not totally naked, and ... making tea? then again, alcohol's probably a bad choice at this time of night.
evan gets dressed, dragging his shirt on before his pants, but just carries his jacket for now. he watches david for a little while. unsure what to do or say. just leaving is probably what he should do, but it also doesn't seem right. ]
Got any coffee?
[ he's not a tea kind of guy, on the grounds of having never once had it before. ]
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[ coffee is mostly just fuel to david. at his parents' there's a bunch of fancy types that do, admittedly, taste good, but david doesn't care enough to buy for taste. ]
[ he's a little surprised that evan isn't just taking off immediately, but he doesn't have any complaints either, which should be a surprise but david just turns to reach up into a cupboard and pull down a mug while he waits for evan's answer. ]
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[ it's just to wake him up and clear his head, which he really fucking needs right now, so he's glad david wasn't drinking or else he'd probably start in on that. he sets his jacket on the counter and waits, glancing around david's apartment again now that he's not so distracted.
it's normal. not the glamorous party room he'd always figured would be any home away from home, but then again, david's proven that's not his whole world lately.
he wonders if he should have something like this. other than the shitty empty apartment they've crashed at before. the thought passes quickly, though, because there's no point. he'd get found out and would have to explain. ]
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[ he does glance at evan over his shoulder, but he doesn't really have much to say. mostly he's just giving a quick look to make sure he's not about to spiral again. ]
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he's no less tense than ever but the anxiety over everything drains as he focuses on the coffee. he glances at david's tea process, considering making a comment but deciding against it. no point in antagonizing him now.
in silence he drinks the coffee, not sure what he's waiting for. he checks his phone once, but there's nothing, thank fuck. ]
Never got the point of tea.
[ idle conversation. this won't be awkward. ]
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The point?
[ he echoes his own thoughts as he turns to lean against the counter. he does, at least, seem to consider it a little instead of just dismissing it outright despite the hint of a laugh in his voice, eyebrows pulled in thought. ]
Think the point is just that people like it.
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